Behavioural Psychology & Self-Awareness In Leadership: The Surprisingly Simple Truth
In the latest episode of Extra-Ordinary Leaders, I was joined by Steve Cockram. As a renowned international speaker and leadership expert, co-founder of GiANT London & Worldwide, and bestselling author of 5 Voices and 5 Gears, Steve’s list of successes is nothing short of extraordinary.
Coach to many elite leaders around the world, Steve is the Jedi of leadership consultancy. In this blog we’ll explore how an understanding of behavioural psychology unlocked extraordinary leadership for Steve – and how it can do the same for you.
The full conversation with Steve, including how to avoid the all-too-common yo-yo approach to leadership, is available here.
Two surprising truths about human behaviour
What is most interesting about Steve is that one of his superpowers is undoubtedly his self-awareness. But, as Steve himself says, at 31 he was, “The least emotionally mature leader.”
His journey to self-awareness started when a contact gave Steve the opportunity to study Myers Briggs® and FIRO-B®.
This was the turning point for Steve. Through his study of personality and psychology, he discovered two things:
Human behaviour is more predictable than we think.
We have only begun to touch the tip of the iceberg when it comes to personality, psychology, biology, and behaviour.
Since then, Steve has dedicated his life to exploring these things, specifically with relation to understanding the superpowers we all uniquely possess and how we can leverage them to our advantage.
Letting go of the reins
Chris: “There is a level of excuse that goes on with people [in leadership]where... maybe because of the targets and pressures we're under, and the fact that we've all got bosses shouting at us to deliver, we feel we need to be in control of what's going on... and so we hold on to those operational reins a little too tightly.”
This felt close to the mark for many people I have worked with.
I'm sure all leaders have, at some point in their career, held on to those operational reins a little too tightly. It's what Chris goes on to say after this, however, that really got me thinking. He shared this quote:
“Checking in with your people regularly is not additional work for the leader, it is the work of the leader.”
This brings about an interesting point, which is at the crux of the Extra-Ordinary Leaders podcast: to understand how to be an extraordinary leader, we must first understand what it means to be a leader.
Using your natural superpowers in extraordinary leadership
Contrary to popular belief, human behaviour is very predictable. Life – and business – becomes more complex when we don’t realise this, and more so when we don’t understand our own behaviour.
Many people may view personality profiling as a flawed science – and indeed scientific exploration is still ongoing. But using the tools and resources available to unlock an understanding of ourselves is just the first step in a long journey.
Knowing this, Steve co-created the world’s premier leadership toolkit, utilising his knowledge of personality types and business to create tools and software that allow leaders to solve their biggest challenges.
And what is one of the biggest challenges that leaders have?
Living a life that is the complete opposite of their personality type.
Giving yourself permission
Sometimes (and I’m sure I’m not the only one to have fallen into this trap) we put ourselves in boxes or assign ourselves labels just to fit in, or in an attempt to be more easily understood by others.
But in doing so, we’re often living – and leading – against our nature.
Steve: “The most extraordinary leaders I know are the people who give themselves permission to lead through their nature and the way they were made to be, rather than trying to conform to some traditional models or typical leaders. They give themselves permission to lead with their superpowers… and don’t try to be an imitation of somebody else.”
Know yourself to lead yourself
Renowned leadership expert Warren Bennis built his leadership philosophy on the belief that the best leaders lead themselves, and it is this that Steve echoes as he emphasises the importance of knowing ourselves to lead ourselves, and leading ourselves before we can lead others.
Steve: “Know your nature. Not just nurture, not just choice – understand the superpowers that you uniquely have. If you can learn to lead that way, out of a place of passion, you will always carry a level of energy, dynamism... and a skill set that gives you a chance to be extraordinary.”
Truly knowing ourselves means we can recognise and predict what our natural reaction to a situation would be, while allowing ourselves that moment of pause to think about what the best reaction would be, even if it’s not aligned with our default nature.
This sort of self-awareness, built on a deep understanding of our behaviour and personality type, is the key to intentional leadership.
Steve: “Intentional leadership is the ability to choose how you show up; what you say, when you say it, and how you use the influence you have. You can’t do that without self-awareness. It just doesn’t work.”
If Steve’s insight has inspired you to dive deeper into your self-awareness but you’re not sure where to start, try answering these three questions:
What are you afraid of losing?
What are you trying to prove?
Who are you trying to prove it to?
For Steve, unlocking this level of self-awareness opened the door to his extraordinary leadership. You never know – it might just do the same for you, too.
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The full conversation with Steve Cockram is available here.
For more information on Steve, head over to LinkedIn, or check out his books: 5 Voices: How To Communicate Effectively With Everyone You Lead and 5 Gears: How To Be Present And Productive When There Is Never Enough Time.
Extra-Ordinary Leaders releases new episodes every week. Follow along on LinkedIn to be kept up to date.
