HOW TO FEEL SAFE
When I was 14, my friends & I used to go shopping in London every weekend. We’d hang out at Kensington market (anyone remember that goth hangout!?) or Portobello Market feeling ever so cool and grown-up. We were trying out our newfound independence, wearing too much makeup, skirts that were too short, you know the drill!
Once in the depths of the markets, we’d realise we needed a meeting point in case we got lost - we didn’t have mobiles then. At 6 feet since I was 13, my friends would always joke “If we get lost, let’s just meet at Dolly!”.
This past year has been a bit like my outings in London. New and unknown, busy not with crowds around us but with a torrent of cognitive information, threats, uncertainty, news reports and questions on “How do we weather this?”.
In a busy crowd, I always give my kids a landmark (not myself even though I’m still 6 foot), which they must go to if they lose me. I pick something visible, easy to get to and near safe people.
Where is your safe landmark to run to when you're feeling a little dazed, confused and lost? What is your lighthouse in the storm? Where do you gravitate to, to feel safe? It could be your landmark is actually quite a destructive one, a place of anxiety, addiction (from harmless tv binging to drugs), obsessive or negative thinking? Or is your landmark a place of safety, rooted in deep relationships, purpose, loving others, laughing?
Last week my blog talked about the need to create ‘Time to Think’, time to process this cognitive overload with someone else to get the fog out of our thinking brain so we can be clear-headed. This is so important to assess where you are in life, mentally, relationally and professionally. My thoughts this week are a continuation of that.
“Where is your safe meeting point?”
Are you lost in a crowd or sea of business and need someone to show you out of the crazy? Do you need to assess any patterns of behaviour you are repeating that may or may not be helping you in this storm?
Last night I was leading a career development workshop and I got my clients to write a dream CV for 10 years from now. I then got them to work chronologically backwards plotting what they needed to do and when to accomplish this 'dream' CV.
What do you want your mental, relational or professional CV to say about you this time next year when we will be out of the Covid era (hopefully!)?
Can you become more acquainted with your safe landmarks? Do you need to schedule a time to think with a family member, a coach, a friend or a colleague to find your way to safety and clarity?
Let's discuss this further - reach out to me at info@dollywaddell.com